This picture is a comparison between September 2019 and March 2020.
I am so proud of myself for the progress I have made. But let me tell you this has not been an easy journey. In fact, this road was similar to a roller coaster ride with lots of ups, downs, and wild turns.
I have started this journey so many times. The very first time I started on the weight loss journey was after my second miscarriage. Since then it has been an uphill battle to get weight off.
I tried many "diets", working out and incorporating healthier food options. None of it worked work me. I joined several gyms through that time. But again nothing seemed to work. I had started to go to a dark place when it came to my weight. It would be made worse by stupid people who would see me at the store or while I was out and about and ask me "Are you pregnant?" "When are you due?" Depending on my mood my responses would vary from "I am not pregnant but thank you for reminding me that I am fat", "Oh, I just had a miscarriage so thank you for being an insensitive jerk", "Oh, you may have me confused with someone else because I am not pregnant". Sometimes I would just smile and walk away or I would glare and walk away. I admit my reactions at time were not so nice but I seriously hate those two questions. They are right up there with two other questions I hear: "When are you having kids? and "Are you going to go back to your social work career?" But I digress.
So what changed, you may ask. Honestly, I am not sure. I just know that weight wise I was the heaviest I had been in my entire life, stress was high, and I felt like I would stab the next person in the jugular that asked me if I was pregnant. Not a good place to be. I joined my last gym and saw very little progress after a month of going 3-4 times a week. Then life hit me hard and I decided to leave the gym because I was no longer able to attend or afford the membership.
I woke up one morning after canceling my membership at the gym and asked myself why I wasn't utilizing the equipment I have in my house. You see, I have a treadmill, free weights, a bench, and a copious amount of workout dvds (that at some point in my life I had enjoy doing). So I decided that I would go back to doing them and using my equipment. I even committed to walking the dogs more. Don't get me wrong, I try to regularly walk the dogs but there is always room for improvement and they sure do love being outside. Anyway, I digress again...
So with my love for the dvd and treadmill in my house reignited I decided to put it on my calendar and then start tackling my eating habits. That my friend, is no easy task. Eating is such a complex thing yet so simple all at the same time. I am a vegetarian but had finally realized that as an adult I was an unhealthy vegetarian. You would think being a veggie that I would eat lots of veggies, fruits, all things healthy. BUT that was so far from the truth for me.
The more I looked at myself and what I was putting in my mouth I was a bit horrified. I had to finally admit to myself that I was part of my problem. So I slowly started weaning myself from some of the junk I was eating and was slowing incorporating healthier options. This was and is a "painful" process. I would sometimes self-sabotage and convince myself that it was okay if I didn't eat it today because I could eat it tomorrow. But we all know that tomorrow never comes. This went on from about October to pretty much the end of the year.
In December I decided that 2020 was going to be different. I started claiming that 2020 is going to be different year and its going to be a better year. I am going to find better health and get rid of this weight once and for all.
January comes around and I found myself being more active and actually eating a healthier breakfast and trying to do so for the rest of my meals for the day. I noticed that I had decreased the amount of excuses and cheat days. By the end of J an I had realized that I actually was starting to lose weight (according to the scale) but I couldn't see it physically. This was a turning point for me.
I incorporated one more change: instead of being obsessed with weighing myself everyday, I decided that I would weigh and log my weight on the first of every month. By February I was on a roll and while my weight loss journey was a slow moving train I at least was finally starting to lose weight and keep it off.
One of my best friends Audrey and I decided that we would do a detox together. We wanted to do this so that we could reset our pallets, and continue our journey of better health and weight loss. So we committed to do it for 21 days in March. Guys, let me tell you that was that hardest 21 days of my life. We did the Daniel Fast diet. We tried to do the whole thing of food and spirituality but the food part kind of took over. As a result I think I want to do it again at a later time so that I can focus more on the spiritual side of things.
There are many rules and restrictions in the Daniel fast. In summary, its essentially the ultimate elimination diet. If its processed or in a package you can't eat it. It forces you to make things from scratch, which I did enjoy doing towards the end of it. The 21 days ended and I was thankful and was looking forward to many things I hadn't had in the 3 weeks. BUT, much to my surprise my taste buds changed and I find myself low-key wishing I had stayed on the fast. I did drop a couple of pounds and inches. But my biggest victory in all honesty is that my constant state of being bloated had dissipated. Praise God, being bloated is so uncomfortable so not having that issue has been freeing and game changer.
And here we are in April, since September of 2020 I have lost 18 pounds and 3 inches around my tummy. This is just the beginning. I am going to continue of this journey to better health and losing weight. It is not easy but now that I am finally able to see the difference I am even more motivated to continue and not give up like many times before.
Thank you Audrey for doing it with me and thank you to everyone who has been praying for me along my journey of trying and struggling to lose weight. I will keep you guys posted on this journey.
