Lucky?

This has been quite the year. Many ups and down but overall I am beyond blessed. I am so not worthy of any of the blessings that I have. I am so grateful for each of them. God is truly loving and faithful.

Over the past few months, as I slowly share my blessings with others their response tends to be "wow you are so lucky". I am quick to reply "its all God". Truly, everything I have in life is because of God. I pray so much and try my hardest to always rely on God. I can't make it through a day without Him.

So on a quick note, some of the blessings that I have received this year has been my job, being able to spend time with Popeye, finally paying off my credit card debt, and my health is slowly getting better.

At my job, this job was a gift from God. For years my mom was concerned with the fact that I haven't worked since 2012. But I kept telling her that God told me to "be still". So for the past 6 years, I tried to be as still as I could be (which those of you that me on a personal level know how hard that is for me). But I stayed still as for as work is concerned. I did try a job for a few weeks while on Guam and it was a disaster. It made me realize that when God is ready for me to go back to work He would open the door. Friend, when I tell you waiting on God for a job was the best thing ever. This job has been blessing me in ways that I could not have imagined or expected. I am blessed with a good boss. I call her "boss lady". She thinks I am ridiculous for calling her that but she answers to it lol. I have no idea where I got that from or why I call her that but it stuck and I can't call her anything else. I try calling her by her first name but it always comes out as "boss lady". She is a praying woman and it has been a blessing to have a boss that has a relationship with God. It definitely helps when there are bad days at work. She is very understanding and fair.  I have a few awesome coworkers. One in particular, whom I will name "Josephine" she has been such a great friend and coworker. Lord, knows I need her in my life. We share the same birthday. We love to laugh and enjoy life. But most of all, I learn so much from her. God put us together for a reason. One of those reasons is to help me realize that I have been Jonah (that post coming soon) for so long and just needed to stop running. So thank you Josephine for helping me realize that. You are a blessing more than you will ever realize.

At home, having time with Popeye is still a weird concept but I am loving it. We are both always working or tired so we don't do a lot of exploring in our new city. However, we make the most of the time we do have together. We are learning each other like its our first year of marriage because we have been apart for so long up till November 2017. Its been challenging but fun. I love my Popeye.

Finances, we still have a long way to go before we hit financial freedom. But we are plugging away at it one day at a time. We are slowly working our debt following the snowball effect and Dave Ramsey.

Through all of this and so much more, I have prayed and stayed before God. None of the above would have been possible had it not been for Him. Anyway, I am done rambling now but to answer those that keep telling me I am lucky. No, friend, I am not lucky. I have prayed and prayed and prayed some more. But really now I must get back to cleaning my house and getting ready for my upcoming work week. But remember....

Thought of the day: August 15, 2018

Thought of the day: August 14, 2018

This hit home on so many levels..more on that later

Yoda

He knows he's cute...

Life after Guam and some ramblings.

Guam was amazing. Guam was beautiful. Guam taught me many lessons. Guam felt like home. Guam made me feel closer to God. Guam changed me.

Its been 8 months since Popeye and I moved back to the mainland and left my tiny island behind. Oh how I miss Guam. I miss the people, the food, the beaches, and my lifestyle there. It was simple. It was uncomplicated. It had it's challenges but it was amazing. I needed that time on Guam to prepare me for the life I live now.

It has been a very challenging transition. Our household goods were delayed by a month. We experienced a snow blizzard for the first time in over 5 year. I went back to work--I am not longer a stay at home wife and a professional volunteer. Man I miss those days. We have had so many car troubles. And making friends and connections has been difficult. I continue to battle health issues. And for the first time in a very long time. I get to be a wife. Popeye comes home every day. It is such a weird concept to me. Although, the job he has now and their schedule it sometimes still feels like he is on the submarine and has gone underway. The options here are endless. I continue to have a hard time choosing which store, restaurant, etc to go to because there is soooo many to choose from. Its not like on Guam where I had my choice of Ross, Micronesia Mall, NEX, GPO, or Tumon Bay. There are several Targets, Rosses, TJMaxx, just to name a few. What is a girl to do?


Its been 8 months, we have unpacked. I started working, been there 6 months so far. We are trying to get into good routines and habits. God has been blessing us in so many ways. Most recently, I finally paid off my credit card debt. It took a long time to get there but its paid off. Such a great feeling and blessing. There are so many other blessings we have received since being back in the states. So why do I feel so lost and confused. Why do I feel like a part of me is missing? Why do I long for my simple days filled with laughter and adventure as my days were on Guam? Why do I feel so disconnected from God? Where do I go since I don't have my "spot" where I would go to meet God and talk and let go? Why haven't I found that place here? God has us here for a reason, so I am trying to embrace it and follow His lead. He never leads us wrong. I just hope my own thoughts and emotions don't get in the way (that's for another post on a different day). Its definitely a journey.


Life after Guam is hard. Its complicated, There are too many choices, decisions, and options. Too many of everything. People are less connected yet still connected in some way. For example, on Guam, I knew all my neighbors and we made sure to check in with each other every now and then. Here, that is not a thing. I can't tell you how many times I have tried to connect with my neighbors. It just isn't what people do here at least where I live now. Everyone has their own cliche. I don't have a cliche. I have my Popeye, my dog, my coworkers, my Panda, a friend from church, and my friend who used to be a neighbor. Granted that is all I can handle these days because I don't have time for anything else not even for some me time. I am currently sacrificing sleep to type this out. And I am not even sure why.

Life after Guam, its not what I thought it would be. I am not sure what I thought it would be. But it most definitely is not this. Please don't misunderstand me. I am truly grateful for where I am in life at this very moment. I love my house and job. I love having Popeye home more often. But something is definitely missing. I am not sure what that is. And maybe its just me and I need to change the way I am looking at life at the moment. Maybe I really do need to take a break, get some rest so that I can get out of the "I'm always tired" funk. Either way I am embarking on a new journey and if you are up for it you are welcomed to join me. I can't promise I will post often but I will try to keep you up to speed.

Well that is all the ramblings I have time for today. Life after Guam is interesting. As always, lean on God and let Him carry you. Its what I am trying to do as I go through my new "normal/life".

Till next time....

Thought for today: February 27, 2018

God may not always give you the wisdom to solve your own problem. But you can always be assured that Jesus is strong enough to handle it, compassionate enough to feel it, loving enough to care for it, wise enough to deal with it.